5. The road to Malapascua

It was a lengthy, 6 hour drive on windy, bumpy roads. I’d packed my bag up with everything - not that carefully because it’s a road/boat trip not by air. The driver arrived, lifted my bag, promptly refused to carry it because of its weight and instead offered to take my rucksack. One of the Neptune boat boys leapt up, tossed my bag onto his shoulders and off we went to walk round to the car! The drive was all the way from pretty much the south of Cebu island, up the western coastal road to the northern tip. 6 hours of looking out the window as the Filipino world rushed by.

The roads - and traffic - themselves were actually ok.  I’m not sure exactly of the rules of the road and who get priority as it could be that the bigger the vehicle, the more priority you get or it may be speed. I travelled in a little taxi minivan, which meant we overtook and went by trikes and smaller, slower going movers. Buses can, seemingly, overtake as and when they want and when this - as it always does - involves pulling out into oncoming traffic, that traffic must get out the way! None of this applies to scooters or motorbikes with engine power to go fast; they weave and go wherever they please! Bikes can be carrying anything from one person to families of five, often including babies or very young children, none of whom wear helmets. There is a lot of horn honking involved too but I don’t think it’s particularly aggressive, more just to signal ‘I’m here’ …. I’m here and about to overtake you, I’m here and I see you on the side of the road so will go by with mere cm to spare or, I’m here and you are in my collision course and I won’t be slowing down so either run or move otherwise I will hit you. The had quite a cool sunshade type thing that stretched across the windscreen. It seemed to interfere with the rear-view mirror, which fell off a few times. It got stuck back on a couple of times and then flung on to the passenger seat. Not sure there was much mirror use going on anyway! The sunshade was clever though - particularly the fact that it can both be put away or rolled out when needed. I now realise my taxi driver from the airport last week had one too but it was permanently attached so made driving at night even more precarious!

At one point, the stream of traffic got backed up behind a fire engine, who had its blue lights flashing. No one tried to overtake, as is usually the custom, but the driver tutted a lot. The engine was not going terribly quickly so I hoped it wasn’t a blazing fire emergency it was pootling along to. Eventually, it pulled in to a stop at a ‘building’ with a metal roof, no sides and various people sitting around at tables. There was absolutely no sign of any fire or emergency but there were food stands.

Out of the windows, as I watched, I saw all sorts. The sea and coastline, sweeping jungle and palms, fields and lush hills, food stands and little shops. There are dwellings that ranged from luxury, huge, fully weatherproof villas to shacks with tin or palm frond rooves and everything in between. The houses here are all built on the ground, I noticed (rather than up on sticks like in Thailand and other parts of Asia). I wonder if that’s linked to less concern about potential flooding - or less traumatic memorable experiences of tsunami etc. Although they don’t generally seem to plant up a garden as such, loads of houses do have a mass of pot plants everywhere, which I like. There were also a number of schools, many of which are brightly painted while some - the high schools - are large blocks that look like either a school or possibly a prison. I worked in a place a bit like that once. There are few parks but quite a few basketball courts, often in use.

I saw all sorts of wildlife: dogs, goats, scrawny looking cows, sheep and I’m sure even a pig, various birds - including some white ibis / cranes and the ever present sparrows. There were also many roosters about, which I had wondered about as they seem to keep them but I wondered why as they’re not egg-producing. Apparently, it’s for one of the main pastimes in the Philippines; cock fighting and the gambling on the outcomes. Poor roosters. Maybe the way they get their own back is by cock-a-doodle-doing from 4am every morning! The ‘cock pits’ also litter the landscape - they are large arena like buildings with covers and high fencing with a large pit dug in the middle where the inhumane entertainment must take place.

It’s Good Friday today so a public holiday in the Philippines too. The most successful occupation in their history was the Spanish, who brought Catholicism with them and that remains the predominant religion, which is odd because the Filipinos actually seem to be really lovely, friendly & non-judgemental people. There were various churches along the way and we also went past a large procession of people following a man who was carrying a large wooden cross. He definitely wasn’t actual Jesus though.

We stopped a few times on our journey. I had prepared for the day by not drinking much and being ready - needn’t have worried. I did bring my flask of tea and litre of squash with me (only for emergency use, not for drinking freely when I was not sure of facilities enroute!) and had biscuits and cereal bars for the journey. We stopped after an hour for petrol & the driver to go to the toilet (I was still fine at this point) then again after another hour at the side of the road where the driver announced ‘I need to make pee’ and proceeded to go for a wee in the bushes. Another stop half an hour later at a big town, which was apprently the half way point, which had a McD’s and where I did have a wee and the driver spent a while getting and then eating his lunch (at 10.30am). I also popped to the 7-11 shop for crisp snacks and UHT milk in prep for the island! I also bought a small tube of Pringles - that’s mainly so I’ve got something a bit more solid to pack my shells in for flights and getting home! We stopped again an hour later for more driver weeing in the bushes and so he could walk about stretching and throwing his arms around a bit. I suspect one solid drive of work without time to smoke, sit about, nap it chat with friends is actually quite a stretch given what I’ve seen of local the local customs. The locals seem to have remarkable skill for sleeping anywhere. And when they’re not sleeping, they are almost ALL staring at their phones and watching what I think are an endless series of 10 second video clips with their phones on full volume. They do this all the time, no matter what else they should be doing. When I bought by boat tickets, there were three ladies in the ticket booth, all remainder staring at their own screens watching 3 totally different videos with three totally different soundtracks. Not one looked up or away from the despite exchange of details, money and ticket that they did for me.

Anyway, I arrived at the port after about 6 hours, worked out how to buy first a permit to visit the island (which I think is a way of exploiting tourists for extra money but only cost £2) and then a boat ticket and found my way to the public boat. The boats leave when they’re full and the one arrived to still had spaces. Despite that, a twatty English bloke who had been fussing with his bag told me not to sit where I was about to because he was there - a space easily big enough for two more if he and his girlfriend made room on the bench that had 4 people on. I instead perched down on step bit and asked another man if I could move one of his bags that he had at his feet (which should have been piled into the bag pile in the middle) a little to make room to sit and he said no! Massive nobhead. I didn’t hold my tongue as I should have but the people on the opposite side of the boat, who had already noticed moved along to offer me space on their identical bench which already had 6 people on and shifted for me and another person to sit on the floor seating and loudly commenting that it was no trouble and we all needed to make space!I was very grateful to them as they clearly thought the same as me about the others. As more people arrived, the boat boys cam and forced the English couple to move up and make room for others and picked up bags and moved them as they wished too. The English boy caught by eye and I couldn’t help the teacher look with raised eyebrows that escaped onto my face!

Malapascua island is 4 miles off the coast of norther Cebu, and is about 2 square miles. It's name actually translates to 'bad Christmas' - possibly due to a bad storm that hit at Christmas years ago! It has a population of around 6000 people and since they've overfished the seas, there is little fishing and the prime industry is now tourism. However, there is only a tiny pier and landing bays on the island; the lack of a larger pier (which they can't afford to build fortunately) has kept construction to a minimum and the island is, in many ways, largely unspoiled - there are no cars on the island just tracks and walkways ... and scooters and most of the buildings are only one storey tall.

Fortunately the wait for the boat to be full wasn’t too long and we did the little 30 minute sail to the island. On arrival, I realised my hotel is the opposite side of the- not far, about 1km but on sand pathways or round the beach and it here was no way I was dragging / carrying my bag that far so I had no choice but to take a scooter taxi that was offered. I was doubtful about my bag also fitting and offered to pay for two bikes but the locals waved me down and instructed me … big rucksack on the floor between the driver’s knees, me on the very back of the seat and then my bag lifted up and wedged between the driver’s back and my front and off we went - slowly, which I elicited a promise from they driver to do and he very kindly did! A couple of minute later, we arrived, my bag was kindly carrier to my room, I checked in, had my dive check in and booked diving and then had a couple of hours to read in the shade on the beach and just had delicious fish and chips (absolutely not Filipino but delicious and terribly Catholic of me!) for early dinner. The sun has set (it’s 6pm on Friday here!) and the sparkly lights are coming on. I’ve got a nice little room but no kettle. Apparently I can get free drinking water and hot water on demand from the bar though. I shall try that out soon as I go in search of fins, tea ingredient that I need!

I have booked for the next two days of diving - firstly to a local island that everyone is Moalboal recommended I visit, which has a terribly civilised 11.15 meeting time and the next day for local diving at the horrific time of 4.15am meeting to get to the shoal for sunrise.

WiFi here is in the bar only …if I’ve uploaded photos, it means it’s ok and if I haven’t, you know the WiFi is too crap and they will follow. I actually will be back in a few days with tales of my diving adventures and hopefully lots more lovely fishy pictures!